I summoned Eleanor to the bathroom because I needed a favor. Before I explain what I needed, let me sketch out a few conversations I would have rather had while in the bathroom with Eleanor.
Preferred Conversation 1: "Eleanor, I can't reach the toilet paper because I got distracted doing the crossword and my legs are asleep. Can you please get me some toilet paper? Thanks."
Preferred Conversation 2: "OK, I bought every kind of tampon they had at Wall-Mart and I've got a YouTube video on how to use tampons queued up on my phone. We can do this."
Preferred Conversation 3: "You have to pee on that end of the stick. There are no false positives."
So here is what actually went down: when Eleanor came into the bathroom my shirt was off and I was bent over the sink. I handed Eleanor the tweezers and said "Do you see those back hairs right below my shoulder blade? I need you to get rid of those."
No comments:
Post a Comment